down and out.

i'm having a rough moment.
the kind where i get real down and out on myself.
because i'm comparing myself…
shall i explain?

my friends from oshkosh have jobs working in the environmental field or went off to grad school (one just finished her masters in chemistry and is currently traveling around europe). and then there's me, just bumming around working in bakeries and retail jobs. my friend andrew just applied to the DNR in madison and got the job. he'll be moving from fond du lac to madison sometime next month.

and then i think about me. i'm probably going to be working two part-time jobs for a while. IF everything goes as planned, i won't graduate until 2017. and things rarely go as planned for me. plus i'll have to take the nursing exam to actually become a RN. and i live at home. and i'm just so unhappy right now.

when i was sitting for two hours between classes, i was trying to focus on all the things i love, really love. i love my cats (marla is on my shoulder, purring loudly. jasper is creeping his way up my side). i love ava and liam. i love them so much. and that's basically where my love ended.

i don't know. it's just a rough day i guess.
the weather changed.